Ah, the power of the pause. It eludes so many of us in early recovery, and yet it’s such a simple and powerful tool. In fact, it’s one of the cornerstones of most successful long-term recovery programs, and for good reason.
How Our Minds Work in Recovery
Let’s look at how our minds work for a minute. We’ll reflect in general terms without labeling the mind as that of an “addict” or similar since you may or may not subscribe to the disease model. At the end of the day, any program or set of principles that helps keep you from picking up a drink, a drug, or from acting out in any way is a good one.
Feelings vs. Facts: The Role of Emotion in Addiction
Now, back to our minds. Of course, not all minds think alike, but one thing that you’ll probably find in common with people battling addictive or compulsive behavior is that they tend to view feelings as facts.
For example, let’s say you get angry with a lover, a co-worker, or a family member over something that may or may not be significant. In active addiction, or whatever you want to call it pre-abstinence, this anger probably felt justified. You may have thought you needed to drink, use, or act out as a result.
This is merely an example, but usually, we drink, use, or engage in other compulsive behaviors because something is making us uncomfortable, and we’re anesthetizing. That “something” is often our feelings, the way in which we perceive a certain situation.
On the flip side, feelings of elation can also be triggers. Many people engage in addictive or compulsive behavior when excitement levels are excessively high. This is something to be mindful of as well.
Reacting vs. Responding: Why Pausing Matters
The bottom line is that feelings, whether positive or negative, can put us into a reactive state. And there’s a big difference between reacting and responding.
Reacting immediately to situations often leads to regret, but the trick here is to simply take a pause. Yes, we know, it seems counterintuitive, but it’s such an incredible tool.
What the Big Book of AA Says About Pausing
Page 87 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous suggests that we “pause when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or answer.” Again, you don’t have to subscribe to the disease model of addiction, this is just another example.
Pausing allows you to make a more intentional choice in a given situation. It gives time for that immediate feeling to pass and for a second, more rational thought to emerge. This way, you can respond rather than react. The outcome may be completely different, or it might be exactly the same, but at least you’ll have made a conscious decision.
How Pausing Supports Long-Term Recovery
In recovery, pausing frequently is not a waste of time, even though it may feel uncomfortable at first. Slowing down can actually help speed up the healing process because it provides a new kind of strength:
- The strength to respond rather than react
- The ability to sit with thoughts in quiet contemplation and allow them to pass
- A pathway to emotional resilience and inner peace
The Transformational Power of the Pause
Healthy thoughts are born out of intentional thinking. The more you embrace the power of the pause, the closer you’ll get to the life you’ve always desired. All the while, you’ll be leaving old habits and thinking patterns in the dust.
Recovery is a journey of the heart with no obvious destination. We pause daily to allow more peace and serenity into our lives. Over time, this practice fosters balance, emotional recovery, and the ability to share our experiences with others.
Challenge Yourself to Pause
Next time you’re feeling angry or agitated, challenge yourself to take that pause. Notice how you’re able to respond instead of react.
Then, try it again tomorrow. And the next day. Watch how your life slowly begins to shift in some seriously amazing ways. Others will notice the change in you, too. Feelings will stop being facts, and before you know it, you’ll be living a life you’d never even dreamt possible—all because you learned how to slow down.
Kembali Recovery Center is Here to Help
If you or someone you love is struggling with drug or alcohol addiction, compulsive behaviors, or simply needs a reset in recovery, Kembali can help.
Contact us today to learn about our four-week Residential Treatment program, Recovery and Beyond, or simply to have any of your recovery-related questions answered.
